Top 5 Reasons Your Wedding Speech is Driving You Crazy
In 19 years as a wedding speechwriter, I've discovered there are 5 main reasons the speech is, for many, the most stressful part of the wedding duties:
REASON #1: You don't have a lot of speechwriting or public speaking experience, especially at high-profile social events like a wedding (most people don't).
REASON #2: You're not comfortable presenting in front of large crowds (I wasn't either).
REASON #3: You've seen how wedding speeches are portrayed in movies like The Hangover and Bridesmaids and think you have to become Zach Galifianakis or Melissa McCarthy and turn your remarks into a roast filled with insults, zippy one-liners and stories to embarrass the bride or groom (this only works in movies).
REASON #4: With the average cost of a wedding at nearly $34,000 in 2019, you feel unspoken pressure to deliver the perfect speech flawlessly (and fearlessly).
REASON #5: You probably have years, maybe even a lifetime of memories, thoughts, experiences and feelings about the bride or groom in your head and heart. And it probably all feels like one, big jumbled blur in your mind. This makes it almost impossible to step back, get perspective and “see the forest from the trees”—which is exactly what it takes to write a warm, entertaining and memorable speech.
But the good news is that with the right words and preparation, anyone you can deliver the best speech of the day with ease and confidence to honor the bride and groom, and entertain wedding guests.
You have a speaking role in the wedding because you mean something special to the bride and groom. You're wedding royalty.
So it's worth the time and effort to give the best of you in a speech filled with humor, emotion, stories, enthusiasm, surprise and gratitude. Your goal is to connect, inspire and entertain.
And once you have the perfect words, don't forget to rehearse out loud. Then rehearse more. And a little more.
Shelia, a maid of honor client in Washington, D.C., put it this way: "All the preparation and practice definitely made it worth it" (see Shelia's full review here).
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Den helped craft my father of the groom speech at my son's wedding last October. I had previously engaged Den to help with my father of the bride speech at my daughter's wedding. In both cases, Den knocked it out of the park. Not only is he a very talented speech writer, but he made it a point to take the time to get to know me so that each speech reflected MY OWN words and thoughts. Den also did a wonderful job of preparing me to deliver my speeches. I would never claim to be a great public speaker, but when I stood up and took the mike at both weddings, I was totally calm and confident and it showed in my delivery. Simply put, Den is the real deal.
Den delivered a lot more than I expected. His process helped bring out memories and other things I had forgotten or would have overlooked. Throughout our work together he truly cared about putting something together that was unique and fit my personality and relationship with the bride and groom. Then his delivery tips helped me 'nail it' in front of 300 people! It was all easier than I thought it would be. I highly recommend Den's service and will definitely return for my next speech.
The speech was another huge hit! My kids and all the guests loved it! The bit at the end was totally unexpected and blew everyone way. I swear the laughter went on for a full minute. Thanks again for another life changing speech! Until next time, Den. Thank you.
This was a much more enjoyable and effective process than I expected. Den went beyond surface questions into the psychology of who I am, who my daughter and son-in-law are, and what is at the heart our relationship. The result was a speech that 100% honest, fun and warm. I've been worried about this speech for a year but pulled it off much easier and better than I expected with Den's help. I got many compliments at the reception and during brunch the next day. I highly recommend Den.
Hi Den! I hope that you and your family had a wonderful weekend. Just a post-wedding update :-). On Saturday evening, I had the pleasure of giving the speech as the last speaker in front of a packed crowd at the reception, and I must say, WOW! I've never felt as confident and prepared as I did that night, and you are to thank for that! This was indeed money well spent! The speech took eight minutes as planned, and many individuals who approached me afterward mentioned its impact on them, including my brother and new sister-in-law. There was laughter and tears. The three speeches made ahead of me were all very thoughtful and appropriate for the occasion; however, the stories and context of my remarks that you wrote indisputably established the speech as the MAIN EVENT of the reception. I am so thankful for having the foresight to seek a talented professional who knows how to tell stories and has an impactful way with words. You gave me all the tools necessary to succeed and gave my self-esteem a much-needed boost. For future speeches, you are my most significant asset, and im sure that is the case for many others. Thank you so much, Den; your services and process are phenomenal!
Thanks to Den my best man speech was a roaring success. Can't thank him enough for his help or recommend him high enough to others. He has this down to a science and it's a very fun process. Best to you Den!
Den assisted me with my father of the bride speech and was fantastic. I am so grateful to him. The father of the bride speech had me stifled, both in terms of organization and content. After weeks of trying to hammer it out, I turned to Den and he crushed it for me. He was delightful to work with, flexible in terms of incorporating some ideas I had, and organized the speech perfectly. It really was one of the best experiences of my life, and I am extremely pleased with how the speech went. I highly recommend him to anyone who wants to give the best possible speech for a special occasion!
Everything went fantastic! Not a dry eye in the house. Even the event employees came up to me afterwards and said it was the highlight of the night! Thank you very much for your help. 2nd daughter is getting married June 14, 2025. Going to need your help one more time and looking forward to it! Thanks again.
I have worked with Den three times over the last six years to create speeches for my all three of my daughters. And the last speech I gave Saturday night might have been the best. Boom! The speech was funny but heartfelt and surprised the audience. They loved every minute of it and wanted me to go longer. It was a great way to end my FOB duties. Den is a very talented writer you can trust to make you look like great. Highly recommend.
I wish you could hear firsthand the feedback I received after the Father of the Bride speech Saturday! My guess is you already know how it went but I'm still going to tell you. FANTASTIC! I had a group of young women asked if they could hire me to speak on behalf of their dads on the occasion of their own weddings. I had a father remark that he now questions his speech, from years past, wondering if he pulled off communicating to his daughter what she needed to hear. The best man and maid of honor also spoke and both acknowledge some trepidation following my delivery. My wife has been getting messages about the genuineness of the content. The official conducting the ceremony recognized me as the epitome of a father filled with love for his daughter. I could go on and you would simply nod your head knowingly as you've produced many masterpieces. You are the man!